Why should we want to forgive and move on? The simple answer is that it is the only thing that works and that sets us free.
The noise of holding grievances holds you back, stuck in the past, not able to move on, forward. The noise can be deafening to your soul, because there is so much going on inside your mind and soul, it becomes impossible to hear anything else. The seemingly unforgivable acts loudly protest in your brain over and over again. They rarely sleep. It seems impossible to get away from them. But it is only because you are holding onto them through clenched fists and you haven’t released them. Think about how beautiful the quiet peace could be if you released all that noise from your soul. You can open the door with your willingness and let them out by doing the work of processing the energy that remains. Then you can have quiet and peace filling up the space in your mind instead of all that noise. With peace and quiet you will be able to begin again. For me, I was finally able to stop thinking about the grievance 29 times a day. I could focus on other important things in life. I realized I didn’t have time to hold on to those hurts, it takes far too much time and energy. You can write that book, go run that marathon, paint or hang out with friends. Think about all you can do with the time that has been stolen from you by holding onto the grievance. You forgive for you; you deserve to be free of it. I remember thinking that I wanted to remember everything about the offense, I had to remember it. It was too important to let go of. But, I got to the point that it was too much to carry. If I put all of my energy and brain power into remembering the details of the offense, I wasn’t free to move on in my life and do the things I wanted to do, like be a good mom to my kids. Letting go of grudges and bitterness frees you to be who you truly want to be. Similarly, you might feel like you are dishonoring yourself or your marriage or whoever was wronged if you forgive, but something that brings you peace and allows you to move on is a much better way of honoring than perpetual animosity or sadness. When it seems like innocence is drowning, forgiveness can be the life-giving air. At times it appears as if the world is filled with continuous tragedy. When I feel this way, I ponder forgiveness and all of its gorgeous possibilities. I am forever grateful for all of my lessons in forgiveness. I’ve learned that forgiveness offers peace and the promise of eventual joy through moving on. I’ve learned that forgiving yourself can be the hardest and most needed kind of forgiveness. I’ve learned that forgiveness is strong, not weak. I’ve learned that forgiveness changes vengeance to love and acceptance. I’ve learned that forgiveness is a new beginning and a beautiful opportunity to start again. I’ve learned that forgiveness changes your energy from chaotic to calm. This is awesome because since I believe we are all connected, when our energy changes so does everyone else’s. Often times, we may want to forgive and may fully intend to forgive, but we may not know how. Simply stating that we intend to forgive, but we need some time and space can be very helpful. Another useful concept that I’ve heard many times, but I don’t know who to credit it with is: It didn’t happen to me, it happened for me. This puts the offense in a whole new light. One, where, something good is coming out of a bad situation. There has been some research on the key to forgiveness, which involves trust. Of course, this makes sense, but I believe that the trust can come from you trusting yourself and your own inner light. This quote from A Course in Miracles, “Forgiveness offers everything I want,” resonates with me and makes sense to my soul. I count forgiveness as one of my greatest blessings and I am so happy that I didn’t give up on it. When you are ready to try forgiveness, here is a one of my favorite forgiveness practices that helped me. I have found many, but this one resonates with my soul. I wrote this while searching and praying for a way that would help me do what I so desperately wanted to do, forgive. This beautiful process came to me so clearly that I know it was divine guidance. How to Forgive and Move On
I hope this serves you. Namaste Kim Trotto is a life and wellness coach, if you’d like to work on forgiveness or other issues in your life, click this link to set up a free 20 minute discovery call. https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=14571275&appointmentType=4631477
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Most of us experience anxiety to some degree occasionally and would love a natural way to get rid of anxiety. It may be situational and show up when going through some difficult changes like the loss of a job or relationship. The good news is there are some easy natural ways you can try to get rid of anxiety. For a long time, I did not think that I had an anxiety issue; I thought I had normal “mom” anxiety. But, after two separate people, one of them a mental health professional, suggested that I might, I started to listen and understand that I probably have mild anxiety that can worsen situationally. Some people have more intense and extreme worry and fear that doesn’t seem to go away, this is more serious. See the end of this article for recommendations of when to see a doctor or mental health professional. I am not a doctor or mental health professional and cannot give medical or mental health advice. In case you don’t know what anxiety looks like, here are some common indications from the Mayo Clinic:
Now onto our 5 Natural Ways to Get Rid of Anxiety Fermented Foods and Drinks Research by the College of William and Mary shows that fermented foods and drinks possibly contain probiotics that may help lessen social anxiety in young adults. Probiotics lessen gut inflammation, which can help get rid of gastrointestinal symptoms. Probiotics also change the bodies stress response, which is connected to anxiety. Here is the list of fermented foods that were researched by the College of William and Mary:
Regular Exercise As with many things in life regular exercise can help with anxiety too. Aerobic exercise that gets your heart rate up is particularly good. So, running, aerobic dance, like Zumba, bicycling and swimming would all be good choices here. Yoga focuses on the breath and has meditation periods which can be helpful to calm anxiety. It also can have physical effects like lowering heart rates, blood pressure and improving respiration. There are established psychological benefits too, yoga reduces the stress response and increases energy and feelings of well-being. If there is another form of exercise that you love and makes you feel good, it probably makes sense to try it as well. Getting Enough Sleep Getting enough sleep is another natural way to try to get rid of anxiety. One of the symptoms of anxiety is trouble sleeping and feeling tired, so it can seem like a vicious cycle. For most adults 7-9 hours is the recommended range needed for sleep. Make a sleeping plan and set a phone alarm for when you should get ready for bed. Think about all of the things you will do to get ready and plan for them. Of course, adjust it as needed. Good Sleeping Tips Power Down, turn off blue light sources an hour before bed. Try 30 minutes if an hour doesn’t work.
Design Your Bedroom into a Sleeping Room
Learn Stress Reduction Techniques Meditation has been proven to reduce stress. You can practice meditation in as little as one minute a day. There are lots of great apps available and plenty of guided meditations on YouTube. A great way to start is to listen to instrumental music and focus on your breathing. Your mind wandering is natural, don’t worry, just bring it back to focus on your breath. This next one, you can do anywhere! Deep breathing, be sure that as you inhale your abdomen expands and as you exhale it contracts. Inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Listening to some of your favorite tunes can bring light to your soul, crank them up! Using repetitive statements can help focus your mind and reorganize your nervous system. Here are a couple to try: “Peace begins with me.” “I am willing to see myself differently.” If you want to calm fear, check out this process from another blog post. Avoid Alcohol, Sugar and Caffeine For some, avoiding alcohol, sugar, and caffeine can be tough. I suggest trying it without them and give it time to get out of your system, then see if there is a difference in your anxiety levels. It may feel worth it to you to remove it at least for the time being. Some people have more intense and extreme worry and fear that doesn’t seem to go away, this is more serious. It is recommended by the Mayo Clinic to see your doctor or mental health professional if:
I hope this serves you! Kim Trotto is a life and wellness coach. If you'd like to work on Going from Doubt and Fear to Sure Awesomeness, schedule a free 20 minute Discovery Call, click the link to see if we would be a good fit for working together. https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=14571275&appointmentType=4631477 |
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AuthorI was a school teacher for 20 years and am a lifetime soul learner. I am still a teacher, just a different curriculum. |